Everything seems to be a lie when i hear it from your mouth that you flirt with your ex is normal always like this.... IT JUST HURT SO MUCH... yes i know it does not matter anymore now like what you have said. The amount of tears this few nights is just so scary. Literally crying myself to sleep. Seeing how you placed the grocery just now just shows how much you did not want to share with me and marking your own territory. I did not even make any noise of you using my eggs and the tibits i bought. However i see you not wanting me to eat your tibits really shows how much we are done in your opinion. Hearing you say not going to reply my mum message just hurt me SO much. What have my mum done to deserve your treatment like this. There is so much so much of me not wanting to say goodbye. Being your eyesore is the last thing i would want to be now. I am going to miss you lucky cheery. Love you deeply. In my deepest memory. Never forgotten.
The night before valentine day was so sweet and lovely...that moment shall be my last memory of how fortunate i am for having such a good loving husband. I don't know how much can i endure from there, the pain and sadness. I will try because what i have left is myself. I am sorry i cannot be like you, living under the same roof but not caring for each other, taking each other existence like invisible. I can only either love you or hate you. To someone whom i really wanted to stand by for the rest of my life till old age hates me, felt SO impossible to live with me and do not wish to see or talk to me. Really cannot imagine how my newlywed lunar new year had become. I ruin everything.
if i hurt you too much, i guess im not worthy of you...
perhaps we are just bluffing ourselves...
i can be replaced by your friends...
your friends can heal you
im only around to hurt you...
im of such a trouble to be around with... blur stupid blablabla you name it i have it...
you can never accept me...
maybe we should stop lying with each other.
stop bluffing each other
you are just making life so difficult for me. do you see me avoiding your friend although i don't really adore them? knowing that you dislike them, from dont' know how long ago i stop talking about them infront of you. Even for a short dinner, they asked me to tell you to join. But i know you dont like them so i didnt even asked. i really feel like disappearing from this world. you will never understand how i feel
When you like to start saying "its your day" when you refer wedding day being my day...what does it mean? i am marrying to myself or what? Seriously, be in my shoe and think. how should i feel hearing this? should i be happy hearing "its my day"
At times, i flare my temper talked loudly disrespectful stupid so i am sorry. But at the end of the day i do things that u like. I think for you, i did not force you. at times u will want to hang out with your friends, be it the person i dislike or like, i still tag along because you will want to hang out with them.
They did u wrong. They did us wrong. i cannot deny this fact. it is their wrong, i cannot defend them for this.
How is it going to be like for example i didnt like alex and do not want to invite alex to our house warming. Are you stuck in the middle? because you wanted to invite alex, he is your good friend. yes, maybe you will respect me and not invite alex. But how will you tell your friends or face your friends? say "cause my wife don like him" ?
justfeelingmiserableandyeslifeismiserable
It's my last paper tomorrow!!! I must say i came a longgg way... well some of you might say: oh come on.. its just a degree education, no big deal... NONONO its a tough 3 year journey!! Three years ago, i went to class with my best friend eileen pursuing our degree in business management! She left due to her husband work/job. I continued the journey, i am blessed to have made a few true friends. I feel blessed to have my family supporting me too!!! Last but not least having my next closest kin future husband aka boyfriend to be there for me this 3 years. I think it is even harder for him this 3 years although he does not need to undergo exams and schools!! THANK YOU!!! What i can say now is i will DEFINITELY miss school life!!! with no doubt!!! because this three years i spent it very fulfilling and with little time to spare, suddenly the thought of no classes after work make me scared! I think i am used to fast paced life? Nonetheless congrats to me!!!!
it is only when at the point of time when you needed the necessary support most, your closest kin will show you their true self. Although i am alone in this battle, the battle of a three year pursuing of degree, i think i made myself proud. the stress of school exam school assignment, the stress of family and friends and the stress of work. I am able to make it till today, i do not know if i will be able to get a flying color honour in degree but what i do know is i deserve a pat on my shoulder. a pat on my shoulder for crying alone at times when stress kicks in, for wetting my pillow in the night.
I changed because i used to just think about fun. But now, when it comes to work i will not force you if you are busy or tired due to work. This is of a prominent change i see in myself. i use to everyday wanting to have fun monday to sunday. but now i am clear of the extent i can have.
I will never forget the words you said today. You are just returning what i gave you throughout these days. Sadly disappointed. No matter how angry or sad i am, revenge never comes to my mind. So i left your house every time when we encounter disagreement, do i have to also do the same to you when you are at my place.
It is just too scary to hear your revenge. Everything just went overboard. You have your utmost right to be disappointed. I have mine too. I am feeling so disappointed so astonished so sorrowful so heartbroken.
